Simplice, a young girl from Burkina Faso, Africa shares her experience of struggling with continuous headaches, and her discovery of how we can continue to give joy to others, also in suffering.
Ever since our parents separated, my sister and I have been living with our father. It is a very difficult situation for me, because of my health. Besides suffering from asthma and for two years now, I have also had heart problems. Thanks to the support of many young people who, like me, try to live the spirituality of unity, these physical limits do not prevent me from living my Christian commitment with enthusiasm.
Instead, as a public school student, things did not go well for me. There was not much attention paid to students in my situation, and when I found out that I had to repeat the first year of high school, I changed schools. In the new school I understood better the importance of education and the advantages of obtaining a diploma. At the start of the year, my grades were good: evidently the new incentive was working well. One evening I developed a terrible headache. I hoped that it would pass that night since the next few days, I had to take a series of tests. By morning the headache had disappeared, but when I took my books in hand, it returned, stronger than ever. The same thing happened every time I tried to concentrate on an intellectual task. I went to many hospitals but none were able to diagnose my disease. Meanwhile, my grade average point had dropped, while my headaches had become a permanent fixture. My father had no more money to pay the doctors, so I tried to consult the traditional quack doctors, but to no avail.
Overcome by this situation, strong doubts of faith assailed me. I asked myself: out of seven billion people in this situation, why did this have to happen to me, now that I had decided to take my studies seriously? Yet, in spite of my rebellion I wanted to participate with my other friends in the Focolare Youth group going for an educational weekend tour. I went only to be with my friends, and not really because I believed in it. The meeting started with a video-speech of Chiara Lubich, but I was so angry with God that I didn’t even listen to it, or want to give anything to the communion of goods. Even less interested in what the others were saying, my mind wandered elsewhere. I thought that God had forgotten me that no one could understand me, and these meetings were useless. At a certain point, however, I was struck by a boy who said that in difficult moments we can give hope to others by valuing our personal sufferings. And that it is precisely by making ourselves one with Jesus crucified and forsaken, that we find the strength to love the others.
These words were a challenge to me. I told myself: if Jesus on the cross had pulled back, where would we be now? From then on, I found the strength to accept my situation and believed that God is love also, when he permits suffering. Even if I continue to have headaches, I have found the joy of living again, out of love for my sister and for all those who tried to bring joy all around me. Thanks to the prayers of many, today I feel much better and if there are no other surprises in store, it seems that even my health had improved.
Simplice, Burkina Faso
